Cosmic Question

OK, so I made a JOKE, but wondering if there is a SERIOUS spiritual insight behind it. The reason I’m haunted by a bloated, egotistical political leader is my own selfish, “only I can fix it” delusions of grandeur, coming back from every lifetime, on every planet. throughout time, to smack me with a massive Karma dept, and the only way I’m going to find salvation is to forgive him completely!

QUESTION: Any truth to that?

Near-Death Experiences and Health Status

Many people who have a near-death experience are not actually in any danger of death. Some NDEs occur as a result of meditation, depression, emotional trauma, or other non-life threatening events. The name “Near-Death Experience,” then does not always apply. Some recent changes add Spiritually Transformative Experiences to the mix.

Dreams, June 2020

Dreams: June, 2020

June 2.

I’m arranging photos to make a video for posting on YouTube.

I have several pictures but strip it down to just two.

At least one of them is about Trump.

June 4.

I’m bending down to look under the outer boards of an old, broken-down barn or something. I see an old pair of my shoes in there, but I’m afraid to grab them because there may be vermin of some kind in there. Instead, I touch the shoes with a stick, and realized there’s no mice or anything around. I reach in a little deeper to see the inside of the barn. I a cat’s tail and some feet. I realize it’s a mother cat and two kittens, partially hidden by a paper bag. I feel so sorry for them, getting the feeling they are starving. I see the mother cat working an old piece of tar off the floor, just to have something to chew on. I weep for them.

I see two women. One is wearing a red dress and the other yellow dress. The two women look like the same person, but when one holds her arms out I see there’s just straw under the dress, not a real person. The other woman does the same, but she is real flesh and blood.

June 5.

I’m at a small-scale UFO conference. I want to leave for a moment to get lunch. As I walk out the door I see there’s a huge overflow crowd, a semi-circle of chairs listening to the conference on loudspeakers.

I go to a Chinese restaurant for lunch. They serve a huge plate of food that I am just picking at. I leave and go back to the outer conference area. I’m surprised to find my son in the audience. I feel a sense of wonder that he’s there.
“I didn’t know you were interested in this stuff!”
I tell him I have a huge plate of Chinese food if he wants it.
Instead he asks me to pick up his lunch order.
I go out to pick up his lunch and find myself in a big city, like New York City.
I have to get back to the conference. It seems I left my phone in my hotel room.
I cannot find my way back to the hotel. Maybe I could use Uber to drive me there.

I could just tell them the hotel name, but again remember I have no phone.

I get a feeling I simply have to spend the time I need to get back even if my son and the conference is waiting for me.

June 6.

There are two girls behind me on a crowded bus, chatting happily. Later one of them starts crying because her friend was sent back to Germany.

A car stops in from of me near my driveway. I get out and go into my garage. It’s a different house from mine. I see two different cars in the garage they are not mine nor my wife’s. Suddenly I realize I am dreaming, that this cannot be real.

June 7.

A man is trying to get his bond or contract re-instated. It seems there are three ways to do this. I feel for some reason he chooses the most difficult method. Not sure what the bond is or what the three processes are.

June 8.

Visiting a small town in suburbia. It seems like there is some kind of religious conference. John H. from my spiritual study group is there, and it feels like his name should be “John the Evangelist” or maybe John the Baptist, as he’s spreading the word across this area.
Now I am before some kind of council. They ask something like “How many acts of soul-saving have you performed recently?” I give a number for the week and say there were two today. One on the council probes further: “Even today while you were traveling?” I answer “Yes” because I spoke to two people at the last meeting.

As I tour the area I’m taking photographs of interesting things, like a truck with a sign that read (paraphrasing) “Built solid to stay strong.” The truck however is all dilapidated with flat tires, so the picture is ironic and funny. As I roam around I see C, my wife. She’s all in white garb and looking wonderful.

I go into a restaurant and a Chinese man is serving and he is wearing wolf-head like mask on the top of his head. I greet him with “Hello, Mr. Wolf!” It’s the second time I’ve been served a meal with the waiter wearing such a mask.

I see very tiny ants on a wall. I see larger ants eating the tiny ants. There’s a lady bug eating the tiny ones too. As I look closer I see the lady bug has a huge tongue and is licking up the ants.

(Note: For me this is often a sign of fighting a bug or infection. It may also be dietary advice.)

June 9.

Hypnagogic state: Idea to write little passages: “Little Lessons on Enlightenment.”

June 14, 2020.

A frisky, low-IQ fellow I used to work with has taken the deposit slips from my checkbook. I know you can sometimes use them to transform to a check, so I want them back. He’s elusive, though, and won’t give them to me.
We’re in a grade-school setting and he is a teacher.
I pull him aside and explain that it’s important to me and he finally gives them back.

I see a pen-pal friend of mine, a young woman. She is sitting on a bench as in school gym seating. The looks OK but is wincing in pain from a stomach ache. I wake up with a stomach ache myself.

16 June.

I’m in a room with CP, my ukulele teacher. We have events going on but she indicates I have time to visit a show in the next room. It’s a Chinese event. They have all sorts of things for sale and for show, but much of the merchandise is cheap, like paper products. I see a table with harmonicas on it, which looks interesting. I see tables full of sweets and junk food, like cupcakes and buns. One display has slices of apple pie, which I feel is a bit more wholesome, since it has real fruit in it. The case, however, seems to be the target of flies and I see a dead honeybee in the slice of pie.

I suspect this is dietary advice; too much sweets.

18 June.

I’m talking with some people in a work environment.
They are discussing elevators.

I tell them I once worked for Otic Elevator Company when I lived in New York.
I relate how one of the engineers was explaining how a “governor” works; if there is a failure of any kind, the spinning of the governor will grab the cable and prevent the cabin from falling down the shaft.

25 June

I’m in a bar in what seems like a foreign land. My family is with me in another room, seated at a dinner table. The host wants to do some tests before he serves me. I see he has swabs an medicines as if for a virus test. He seems young; acts like a doctor, but I suspect he’s too young, just pretending. He hands me something which I figure are pills, but when I look at them they are like tiny dice. It turns out they are acrylic advertising tokens or something. Either glass with engraving or acrylic. One drops on the floor. As I go to pick it up, I see all kinds of stones and thing that I collect as they might be valuable.

26 June

I’m in a prison with other inmates. It’s an odd arrangement on a hill side which seems both indoors and outdoors at the same time. I feel I can leave any time, but I have no shoes. My brother Joe once lived there and I am looking for a pair of his shoes so I can walk out. I find several shoes but none that match. Other inmates try to help, but I don’t think they have my interests in mind. It seems the more I look the fewer shoes I find. I’m thinking maybe I’ll just walk out in my socks.

I’m working on one of the wands I make for a hobby. This one is a dragon wand. I feel I should put three stones in the lower jawline in a triangle, with one at the tip. Or perhaps place the one at the tip on the upper jaw, like a small horn.

30 June, 2020.

I’m outside a house. It seems to be my childhood home on 4th Street, yet it feels like my brother Joe lives there. There are many children trapped in the basement. The usual staircase to the basement is blocked by stacks of files and boxes. Then I think I can get food to the children by going around to the window into the basement.

Dream Journal May, 2020

May 1.

Nightmare. People are after me, trying to stab me. They are pretending to be police.

I’m working as an intern in Washington, D.C. I have to deliver these bricks to Post Offices. Instead, I erect the bricks myself at the post office sites. I build a monument, then a small tunnel that turns into a full-sized theater.

I’m on the main avenue in a large city. It feels like New York City, uptown. Wife CM is with me and son DM is lagging behind. I want to wait for him. It seems I am a guest at a Starseed convention.

Starseeds are people who believe they come from non-human civilization and incarnate on Earth to help with the transition to higher levels of enlightenment.

2 May, 2020.

Very clear image of seeing a patch of ground; lumpy with little vegetation. This looked to be a real image, possibly from an OOB vantage point. Had one like this years ago and it turned out to be the first part of a deja vu.

Sleepless interlude about 4:30 AM and I meditated and got the following:
Make a portable mobile that can hang from the ceiling in the shape of a pyramid for people to meditate in. Align the King’s Chamber with the pineal gland.

3 May.

I’m helping someone, a woman, perhaps my daughter, to move into a new apartment. There seems to be cheer all around. Some Mexican young men volunteer to help with the move. As we get settled and the move-in is almost done I discover that the Mexican men were really thieves and they left pillow cases filled with loot around the place. I discover one such pillow case under my own pillow and tell the young woman.

4 May.

Somnambulant download.
Meditate using sound as the focal point to still the mind. In this case the fan in my bedroom blocks out other noises. By focusing on the sound and breathing it sets aside the ego mind and allows images, experience to enter.

6 May.

I’m taking a tour of a brothel. They want me to sleep in a bed that’s been used and contaminated with after-sex disgusting things. I want to get out of there. I’m angry that I have to fix broken down equipment, like a long, bowed rib of metal that I have to repair a set of bolts. There are spiders all over.

I’m metal detecting. Next I’m in an office with Trump’s computers. A database is displayed on the screen. Trump hits a “Hide” button and feels safe that he has gotten away with something. I guess he doesn’t realize you can hide things but that doesn’t make them go away. Anybody could trace the computer files.

7 May.

I see a house being constructed. It has a very substantial foundation that seems to be made of granite. The walls are very thick, like over 3-feet across.

I’m walking in a park where some business meeting in an outdoor setting. I find a bag full of sweets and donuts. I don’t take any, but I want to. I find another bag, but don’t get a chance to grab anything. Eventually the bags of donuts in different places disappear.

(Dietary advice.)

8 May.

Dreamed of building a hand-made antenna, wrapping wire around a wooden frame of sticks each about 18-inches long. Made two of them. They are a little flimsy but seem to work well. Woke up thinking this may be a sign of better communicating.

Midnight wrestling with an angel.
Recently a minister used the word elitist in responding to my questions.
I felt he might be on to something.
I couldn’t sleep until I had composed in my mind a response to him.
This is what I wrote:

Last year I found an Our Lady Untier of Knots medal on the church grounds.

Twice in the recent past, in response to my questions, I heard the word “elitist” used.
Coming from a humble background, it never occurred to me the word might apply.
But, Alas . . .

I realize it takes courage to call out someone’s errors in thinking.

Wondering – maybe I should wear that medallion around my neck until my attitude improves, Ha, ha!
If that happens, it would be a blessing for me, and by a ripple effect the broader community.

In which case I would owe you a big “Thank You.”

File under: Prayer Request.

May 9.

I’m inside a shop that is about to open. In one corner is an area of dirt as if there is excavation going on. I see half buried there large chunks of the rosemary wood that I use to make crystal wands. It’s like they are being mined like some kind of precious ore.

I am working with the shop owner to reserve a space for my works, including the wands.

10 May.

I see water running down the curb from lawn sprinklers.
I feel that I could use the many granite rocks found in my area to block the flow.
I see much larger granite rocks and I seem to be delivering them to a group that needs them. In waking up I feel the granite could be polished and sold on line.

12 May.

I hear/sense someone describing an award that I am to receive for my driving in the mountains.

My guess here that this is some kind of thank you for trying to elevate myself, go to a higher place.

I’m working for a business, a food service or fast-food of some kind.
I’m busy; I even wash the floors. The customers and fellow workers are difficult to deal with. I have to prepare a bunch of rolls. Someone shows me how to pop it in the oven and when it comes out to pour syrup over it. (Dietary advice.) Next, I’m down below the restaurant. The foundation is on some old timbers with mold and moss on the limbs. I scrape some of it off.

14 May.

I’m talking with Fr. T from my church. He’s urging me to make certain steps, but there is glass on the floor. I wake up thinking he doesn’t always know what’s best for me.

15 May.

I see a young, voluptuous woman in a blue denim jumpsuit. There is no top, so in moving sometimes her boobs are showing.

Somnambulent state: I get the idea to make spiritual flash cards.
1. Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness: Be the light.

  1. As a good teacher you don’t come into first grade and scold the students because they can’t read. Instead, you start with the A, B, Cs.
    3. You cannot fulfill your mission to uplift mankind while at the same time calling them a bunch of idiots.

16 May.

I’m at a table in a business meeting with about 6 to 8 people. I leave for a second and place some of my papers on a bench in the hallway, knowing no one will take them. Back in the meeting, I feel it’s like a job interview and I will go on to the next step with a woman to my left. As she is talking a song is playing with the title and word of “I rise!” As she gets up during this song I make a joke about her actions matching the song. It feels like we are moving forward for me to get the job, and my papers include my resume.

17 May.

A clear voice is speaking to me. I don’t know exactly what was said.

I’m in church. They are performing a ceremony to honor women who are dressed in white robes. I sneak out because I have to go to the bathroom. The bathroom has several stalls but one is very new and modern.

I’m lounging on a patio with an old business partner of mine (M.A.F), and we are talking about old times. There are several other old friends there who say hello too. I tell her “The last I heard you moved to Oregon.” She says that she then moved back to Los Gatos, California. We are talking about life and metaphysics and I tell her “Salvation comes from within you.” She says “No.” I reply, “Well, more correctly, it comes from the God within you.” She says “Yes.”

18 May.

I see a middle-aged Asian lady in profile view. She leans her head back onto a wall. Her hair is slightly graying. She turns into a blonde woman who wants me to help her in a caper to steal some diamonds. I refuse.

I seem to be some kind of maintenance man in an apartment complex. Three guys are moving in to an empty unit. One gives me a friendly hello. I am inspecting wires around the door that go to the refrigerator. One of the guys gets into an argument with me and I insult him. We spend a lot of time discussing it and I ask him “What would it take to resolve this?” He’s pretty reluctant to let the matter go.

He’s reclining lazily on a couch or something. As I wake up I see I am in the same sleep position as he was, making me think the stubborn guy is myself.

20 May.

Nightmare. The police are after me. They are shooting at me. I can see the flash from their guns. They are to the west, but I am leaning against some pillows that are propped up by an iron gate, so I feel protected. But now, the gunfire is coming from the north as well, I run to escape. I wake up – the pillow are from my bed. I watched a crime show last night.

21 May.

I’m making one of my wood and crystal wands (hobby) and I lose one of the stones.
I look for it. It seems it dissolved in water somehow.

I’m giving a lecture to people on the front lawn of D.H.’s house (a web content fellow I am working with). Someone helping with the presentation, J.S., another friend, has been drinking and something goes wrong, so the audience is out of step with the talk. He seems drunk or confused. I want to get out of there before D.H., the web guy, sees me. I gather up my papers, but there is a mess, a confusion about what is mine and what is his, and some papers are strewn across the sidewalk. I want to clean them up. But D sees me and talks. He knows the talk went badly, but I feel OK about it.

23 May.

I’m looking over a map, finding locations for some kind of meeting. Several locations stand out in black squares. (Mapping out my plans?)

24 May.

I’m sitting in front of a powerful man. He wants me to drink a pulpy mixture that is much like orange juice but I know it is mostly glue and paper made from the paper stems of lollipops soaked in water. I drink a little but then refuse. He threatens me, but I make a joke of it.

25 May.

I’m at the top of a ladder on the side of a very tall, narrow building.
I feel I am precariously perched up there, so I hold onto the handles at the top of the ladder. The top of it ends with two (upside down) U-shaped handles. One of the handles is loose and wiggly. It breaks off and I drop it, down to the ocean below the building. As it falls I see it’s a pair of my reading glasses.

Not two small children are coming up the ladder behind me. I seem to be holding the door open for them to enter the upper room. In the upper room ad several adults. They seem to be leaders. The two girls enter the door which leads from the ladder to another steep staircase. Adults are walking up the stairs too, pretty much ignoring the girls. One child gets stepped on and falls backwards.

The second child finally gets the attention of one of the adults. They are talking about communicating in different ways. He is eating from a plate with a half consumed tortilla on it. There is a pool of oil and a glob of salsa near the small amount of tortilla that is left on the plate.

He says the communication is like the tortilla mixing with the condiments. The girl responds by taking the tortilla and thoroughly mixing it, back and forth, onto the oil and the salsa, as if to exaggerate the need for more involvement with the adults.

I wake up thinking this refers to the star children trying to waken the adults to their presence.

27 May.

There’s a robbery of some kind and the police arrest a bunch of people. A Mexican gang is rounded up and somehow I’m swept up with them. A group of us are in prison now and I befriend one of the gang leaders, a small man in his late 40’s. I ask him if he didn’t have friends, even in the gang. He said there were only a few who were real friend.

Behind the cells there is a long tunnel where the inmates are allowed to keep personal possessions if they keep the area clean. The man has a son and I buy the boy a toy train and place it behind the cell of the gang leader. He’s happy I got the toy for his boy. I had to be careful to keep his spot in the tunnel immaculate. During the course of placing the toy there I had to remove some white rocks and small tacks.

In another part of the jail I’m telling a different inmate about removing the rocks and tacks, but I realize he’s trying to pick my brain for something he can use against me, so I break off the conversation.

28 May.

I’m in a big hotel with a business campus. There are small groups and couples roaming around the grounds. People are giving and receiving gifts; mostly food items, small favors, movie recommendations. It seems random, but somehow everybody get what they need in this mix-and-match system.

Background: The day before I decided to send one of my art creations, a crystal wand, to my sister with instructions to feel free to re-gift it to one of her artistic children.

30 May.

I see houses on a hill. I zoom into one home. On the side is a service box for electricity. It seems the connections are important. The wires connect some kind of network.

I’m in an office building where I used to work. One of my business friends, M.A.F, is there and want me to man the switchboard. I don’t know how to operate it. This switchboard also covers another business, a federal security firm of some kind. If someone calls, I don’t know which buttons to push or even what to say, especially for the security firm. M.A.F’s husband is a politician, Rod D., but I see his name and it looks like Seco Delano, or Seco Delaney. I have to leave for a while and when I come back, I wonder how many calls I missed.

31 May, 2020.

There’s a long winding road on the west side of Santa Rosa, California where there are apple orchards. I am looking at the arc of the road from an aerial vantage point. I then zoom down to street level. The grassy area on the west side of the road is now covered with a canvas type tarp. There’s a girl who has wiggled under the tarp to the far end, and she invites me to join her in a snugly position.

Now the covered area turns into a posh French resort. I see an angelic-looking boy, all in white. I ask him if he speaks French. “Un pue.” (A little.) He breathes into his hands.

One companion leaves me and another man joins me. He invites me into a room where an older man is dying. It seems like an honor to be with the dying man, as he is open to the miracles of the afterlife. His hands are distorted with arthritis, or edema or something. He laments his loss of hair, but still seems animated and excited. He asks me why I a here. I say, “Well, I’m a nurse.” He wonders if I want to treat him. I feel like, “No, you are treating me,” with your spiritual attitude. I decide not to force my way into the conversation, but to just listen and observe.